Cemetery Etiquette

My wife and I go walking in a locale cemetery daily. I have been shocked at the number of people that walk over graves of the deceased. Not talking about walking thru in order to get to a grave. I am talking about walking over graves for exercise. I had been taught to respect where people are buried. What if any etiquette do you follow when walking in a cemetery? There are paved roads where we do our walking.

I run and have a route that will take me through a cemetery that I very occasionally use to get some rolling hills.
Mostly paved roads with a few gravel in one section. I never and I mean never go off the drives.
No runner I know does anything different and most are like me in considering it to be slightly disrespectful
in general to even run there. Some won't run in a cemetery at all. I only incorporate into a route maybe just
before or after sunup on Sunday mornings.

I was taught to walk between the graves and not across them.

When I asked a pastor long ago about it,, with my question being; "What about unmarked graves, or where the markings are gone? How do you show respect for those graves?"
He said he'd never thought about it,, and never came back with a good answer.

I also do my best to avoid blatantly stepping on a grave.

I do Honor Guard at many Veteran's funerals. I did so also when I was active duty. And we decorate cemeteries for Memorial Day and Veteran's Day. We clean the graves and headstones of Veteran's. We visit graves of the fallen.
And in many cemeteries, especially National cemeteries, it is impossible to not step on a grave while you are performing other tasks.

Our take and guidance, is if you're not doing something purposely disrespectful, we do what we have to do.

I see families or other groups visiting graves, as do I and my Veteran friends. And we're visiting other graves while we're at it. Those we are visiting and remembering, and graves beside would not be offended if you stepped on their grave.





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I do the same thing, I never walk on a grave. Ever.

I try to stay off grave sites and even feel kind of bad walking over my pet Cemetery when mowing the grass.
But I've also said, people can walk all over me when I'm 6' under but I won't let them walk all over me when I'm still upright.

Seems the cemetery admin should correct this. Sure wouldn't happen around here.
Walking across graves? My first earning experience was mowing cemeteries with a walk behind mower. At the time it was a necessary evil(?) of grounds maintenance.

I try to not disrespectfully walk across graves. We place flags on headstones for Memorial Day and put them in the ground in front of the headstone. Kinda gotta be standing there. But I'd bet they understand.

Certainly a proper solemn demeanor should be maintained by all visitors. Common sense dictates at times that stepping on or walking over a grave site should be avoided, but if necessary to do so in order to get to a grave site, this is excuseable. In a cemetery, you are not showing respect for the dead, but rather for surviving family. At the veteran's cemetery where my wife is buried,the proximity of the graves makes it alsmost necessary to step on a grave to get to one in the middle of a field.

Bob Wright

I can also tell you some cemeteries have specific rules against "recreational" activities.
I believe Arlington is posted this way.

Bad form seems to be the new lifestyle. I'm gonna be cremated

I could relate a personal scary story or two about cemeteries but I won't, both involve beer. Gives me the creeps thinking about them.

You can run a lawnmower over them but you cant walk on them?

I visit cemeteries quite often. I make a point of never walking over or on a grave.
I don't see too many people out in the cemetery when I go, but wouldn't have a problem asking somebody to be respectful if they were my part of the cemetery.
There's been a lot of vandalism at the cemeteries where they've pushed over or broken headstones. Unfortunately, a lot of that has happened in the war veterans or Civil War bivouac.

I was taught the same thing but I think I would have interpreted it on my own.

Many, many years ago while in D.C. for a military conference, two fellow officers and I went for an early morning run and went through Arlington National Cemetary. Suddenly one of the other runners stopped and vomited, and unfortunately it was right on a grave area, even if not deliberate. I helped steady the suddenly sick runner, an officer I worked with but was not actually a friend, and asked him if he was well enough to continue and by the way, this would make a great story to tell our commanding general later that day at the meeting. He then looked into sicker than before. Of course I never told anyone, but I know that even years later he was fearful of me every telling anyone about how he had vomited on a soldier's grave. I'm pretty sure he is gone now himself and possibly buried in Arlington right now.

I have never thought about this nor have I been instructed on this matter but I would never knowingly step on a grave I would always walk around.

Mobuck said:

Walking across graves? My first earning experience was mowing cemeteries with a walk behind mower. At the time it was a necessary evil(?) of grounds maintenance.

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Same here. There are times when it cannot be avoided. While I don't do it on purpose, I guess it would depend on the situation if I saw someone else doing it. As far as walking or running in a cemetery, I don't have any problem with it. Some of the cemeteries around here were designed to be "rural garden cemeteries"- essentially used as a park where people could come and bring their family for a day's outing.

as a boy, I was taught to go around if possible but across if it was not. I normally don't visit grave sites after a funeral. I prefer my memories of my healthy loved ones. My father is a Vietnam veteran and I am honored to take my father on Veterans Day to visit a local man's resting place who was killed in Vietnam.

JackBull said:

My wife and I go walking in a locale cemetery daily. I have been shocked at the number of people that walk over graves of the deceased. Not talking about walking thru in order to get to a grave. I am talking about walking over graves for exercise. I had been taught to respect where people are buried. What if any etiquette do you follow when walking in a cemetery? There are paved roads where we do our walking.

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People today are not taught anything about respect and love of country. Makes me very sad.